Welcome to the Wilson/Henderson Household where the laughs and the hits just keep on coming until you laugh from the hits and cry from the laughs!
So first up in the household news, I just used Nair on my oldest daughters legs for the first time. I refuse to shave any child of mine. She will have to learn the same way I did... wait until mom's out of the house and then spend the next two hours cutting myself and trying to come up with a plausible excuse for the massive amounts of cuts. I knew her legs were getting bad but given the fact that I'm mostly pretending to be awake when they are getting ready for school, I don't notice that below my daughters shorts it looked like she was wearing black leg warmers and that is me being nice. Of all the traits she had to get from her father, this one I am NOT happy about. And I know she got it from his side because I actually called my mother, she confirmed we do not have hairy women on our side of the family. I never looked at my XMIL long enough to wonder if she suffered from extra hair. I do remember the X as having hair on his legs because I HATED when he would rub his legs against me the few times we were in bed together. HAted it.
So now Big girl is walking around the house rubbing her arms and legs saying how it feels so smooth and so weird. I totally do not blame her, I did the same thing the first time I nair'd... I also remember thinking if Nair is out there, why the hell do women prefer razors. I mean seriously rub cream on wash hair off. Hair stays gone a long time. Versus rub foamy crap on scrap a sharp blade over skin, cuss because you hit a hair bump and now you're bleeding not go in an absolute straight line because you were too busy smarting over the bump and cut yourself again and when it's all done you have about two weeks of smooth goodness before you have to repeat. Oh hell no!! Nair for me all the damn way. (Though I do shave some things) So I'm going to see how she adjusts to being Nair'd once every couple of months.
In other health and beauty news, I am still running late and feeling like a broken typewriter. Today marked day five on the missed period logs. I don't think I have ever been this late before. Makes me wonder if there's a lost tryst I should be trying to remember. I mean if by some miracle and yes I'm gonna stick with miracle I'm pregnant (I'm not I know I'm not) I'm gonna have to start going to church more because ah... I haven't had sex since 2011. That means old boys little guys have been lost in there for a little under three years. So no, not preggo. More than likely starting menopause. Wanna say this is gonna be fun but I remember my mother's menopause. It was NOT fun. Heat on in the middle of summer, AC on on during a blizzard Windows rolled down in the car in December and trying hard to hang out of the windows because she cranked the heater up in July. I actually made a cop wonder what the hell was going on in the car one day cause I was hanging out of the window like a dog sweating my ass off. He pulled up beside her and asked if I was okay, All I could pant was that my mother was having a cold flash and had the heat turned up. Somehow he understood and just kept on going.
I'm happy to say that if I'm having mood swings, I'm not noticing. But then I think I'm certifiably nuts anyway so not sure if I am or not. I know I've been pretty happy as of late. Maybe mood swings for me will just be a massive evening out of my moods. That would be awesome! I'm probably the only woman ever to actually be happy about menopause.
Hmm... Is there anything else??
Oh yeah. So as stupid crap always does, it gets back to the person it's about and this crap was about me. The x's new Mrs. thinks I should drop the name Henderson because it's hers now and I'm not a Henderson anymore. On one hand I'm tempted to say have at it, the name never did me any good but then on the other hand, I put blood sweat and a shitload of tears into that name. I'm like Tina Turner. I earned that damn name. True I only use it when I run across a teacher who insists that because my children are Henderson so must I but nearly EVERYONE calls me wilson now. I don't want the name and would happily drop it if I ever get married again but damn, maybe it's the fact that she wants me to drop it makes me want to hold onto it even more. Keep in mind that I'm laughing my ass off about it. I'm not mad at all.
Everything else in life is going swimmingly. Absolutely nothing else to blog about. That or my mind is just drawing a blank.
I turn 35 in a few days. Oddly enough I'm looking forward to it. I'm at a good place in my life right now So 35 isn't so scary.
Stay frosty bloggers! I'll be back!
