Monday, August 19, 2013

And A is for...

Aggravation!

Chances are that since I haven't managed to spell that right all dang day and the fact that I have already had over 16oz of iced tea with Firefly Sweet tea Vodka in it, this might prove to be an interesting blog...

So as I sit here with my way too big bag of peanut m&m's (yes, I have chocolate and vodka, no I don't wanna talk about it as it will require much more vodka...) I need to contemplate aggravation...

Homer Simpson had an episode where he said "You know what grinds my gears?"  (Or was that Peter Griffin from Family Guy?  I watch a lot of cartoons)  I guess that's a good way of starting.

You know what grinds my gears?  People who pretend to be your friends but really aren't.

Everyone has one or several of these friends.  For me, I have A LOT of these people.  Mostly on my Facebook.  Most of them that I went to high school with.  They put up all these posts that require answers but then when you respond, they act like you haven't said a word.  It's like high school again.  You include me in the group but when I voice my opinion, you act like I'm the hanger on that should only talk when spoken directly to.  And it's not even their posts all the time.  I don't know about you, but I have this thing where I randomly go to someone's wall and say "Hi!  was thinking about you.  How are you?"  This is not me jumping up and down saying "I'm here!  Notice me!" this is two things.  This is me being nice because you probably were actually crossing my mind and I'm generally interested in what's going on in your life.  This is also a test.  Chances are that I have been treated like the step child that shouldn't voice her opinion even when asked by you and I want to see if you are really as shallow as you are coming across.  You have no idea how many people hit the chopping block as far as Facebook is concerned because they don't respond.

What else?  Ah!  Something that I witnessed today.

RUDE PEOPLE/ RACIST PEOPLE

Example one, my mom and I went to her orthopedic consultation today regarding her knees.  While sitting in the waiting room pretty much everyone looked up at my mom and smiled.  She indicated she was cold and one woman came over to tell her that the place we were sitting was always cold and if the couple to the side of us got up, we should take their spot as it's always warm there.  Nice of her.  My mom was called to the front for something and again everyone looked up and smiled because we're in the South and people tend to be just that nice.  While she was up, I sneezed.  If you actually know me, you know that this was not a quiet thing.  My sneezes range from a comically high pitched Achoo something that sounds like I'm trying to blow my nose out of my eyes.  I never know what one it's going to be.  Anyway, I sneezed.  Do you know not one person looked up or even muttered "bless you"?  I'm pretty sure that everyone saw me some in with my mom especially since I almost tripped over the side of a chair and face planted on the floor. Maybe it's my sense of whatever but I don't care if someone sneezes clear across the room, I say Bless you.  It's something my mother taught me.  And I know that it wasn't because everyone was in their own world because a minute later when my mom came walking back to our chairs, freaking everyone in her path looked up and smiled.

Uhm...huh?  Wow.

Example two of what I'm pretty sure was racism on parade.  We've all been to Walmart.  Don't deny it, you've been.  We all have.  I'm walking down the aisle on my way to the register and coming at me was Mexican teenagers I've seen in a long time.  Complete with the soccer jerseys.  They weren't being loud, they didn't smell, they didn't even look out of place except for the fact that they were tall and their features gave them away as clearly being Mexican.  There was an old lady walking in front of me.  Now the aisle was big enough for the two of them, the group of five (Who had formed a single file line) and the old lady, to pass each other with enough room for a mac truck to go between them.  She looked up at them and not only stopped but moved to the farthest side of the aisle opposite them and watched with horror (You really cannot mistake horror on an elderly person's face).  Then she noticed that a black woman was standing behind her and she stepped back in front of me and every other step she had to glance back to see that I wasn't too close.  I was tired or else I might have played a mind game with her as I'm apt to do to people in Wally World.  Mom said I should have looked her in the eye and said "Boo!" (My mom can be funny sometimes.)  But the fact that she was that put off by Mexicans and a black person was just really...aggravating to me.

What else?  There are so many many things that are aggravating to me.

While I find something else here's something for Rachel Who suggested tonight's topic be Apples and hinted that I could do all sorts of yummy things with them...

White Chocolate Chip Apple cookies

Unwarranted Advice

I would say that this falls in the aggravation category.

Everyone has an opinion but here's the thing.  Sometimes you need to listen to people.  I mean really listen.  Not only to their words but the tone of voice that tells you I want you to know, or I need to vent and I don't really need advice.  Yes I know that your advice is probably what I should do and it will probably lead me to sunny days and freaking happiness but dammit I don't want to hear it right now.  Of course some of my friends that unwarranted advice leads to fun, mayhem and maybe serious trouble.  But still at that moment, I don't want to hear it.  Okay... example... *Think, Dette, Think!*

Me: My husband is really an ass sometimes.
Friend: Oh?
Me: Well the other day I was having an asthma attack.  I mean I really couldn't breathe and I felt like I was going to pass out. My inhaler wasn't working and do you know what that asshole did?
Friend: What?
Me: He actually stood there and watched me fade in and out of consciousness with the phone in his hand before he called the paramedics.

(This is the part of the conversation where the 'friend' is supposed to say something to the affect of "No shit, that ass!")

Friend: You need to leave him.

I wanna say, "Bitch I KNOW that!"  Cause I do, I really do.  I knew that about three minutes after "I do" but I don't need you to tell me that.  I need you to agree with me that he's an ass and help me plot murders that look like accidents to cheer me up.  I don't need you to tell me that I need to leave him.

Okay so that's a really bad example of unwarranted advice but I claim the vodka defense. Besides, it was kinda meant to make you laugh.

I'm kinda jamming to my WMP which for once is NOT playing kissy lovey songs for once.  It's playing the kinda set list that makes me wanna get up and dance like I have black people rhythm. (there is no non racist way to describe my dancing so I'm going to let your imaginations take over that one.  *Insert devious giggle because I can only imagine what your brains are coming up with*)

Another one for Rachel...

Dutch Apple Cake

On the subject of Kissy love songs... And this is the last topic I will cover in Aggravation... The mere fact that almost everyone around me is happy in love and I still can't get a guy to pay attention to me is starting to aggravate me.  Another of my friends got engaged this weekend.  I'm happy for her.  I think it's wonderful but it's one more person in front of me in the long line of people who get to have that happiness that I crave.

EH.  I'm gonna stop there cause trust me, I could go on ALL NIGHT about that particular aggravation...

So this was 'A' aggravation... How'd I do?  Leave me a comment!

Ciao! or since the topic was an a maybe I should say Arrivederci!