This is my year...

So I'm kinda thinking that this is my year...

For years I've been sitting and minimally complaining about how I never catch a break; how I take one step forward and get pushed three steps back.  I blogged about it but on Facebook and to my friends, I rarely said how much it was bothering me that nothing was happening for me.

I realized that part of it was my fault because I wasn't doing things I could have been doing to help myself, and because it simply wasn't my turn.

It wasn't my turn to catch the so called break that I thought was long deserved and long denied.

I apologize to God for all of the whiny girl prayers I sent up.  I would have deserved it if he had smote me down.  But he didn't because he's a kind and loving father and he had a plan for me.

So, last Monday I bought a car.  I researched and researched and even watched four cars on Ebay motors for like five days before I finally threw everything I'd found out of the window and begged my mom to take me down to Rock Hill Public Auto Auction in South Carolina.  What I walked away with, or rather drove away with, was a green 2001 Volkswagen Passat Wagon...

Isn't she cute?  She has issues, but then every used car does.  But she gets me from point A to point B.  And she's all mine.

And on the heels of that, I was driving home on Tuesday and decided to check my email at a red light.  Imagine my complete surprise when I found an email offering me a new author contract!!!

I have always considered myself a writer, but now I can SAY I am.  I am going to (hopefully) be paid to write!!  And the best part is that they've only bought part one of the story.  If Part one sells well, Part two is all but written and ready to go.  I'm doing some final tweaks and then I'm going to move on to another story altogether and then back track to the daughter of the first story's story.

Honestly, right now the only thing that could possibly bring me any higher than I already am is if the guy I've been crushing on to ask me out finally.  Seriously, that's the ONLY thing that could take me all the way up.  I don't even care if it's the absolute worst date of my life, the fact that he asked me out would be the cherry on the top of my cake.

I am seriously loving life right now!!  This is my year.  I can feel it!

Words...

Words are my chosen profession;

Words are what I wield like a sword.

Words both create and destroy in my world

But words fail me when I try to speak to you.

I want to say notice me.

I want to say talk to me.

I want you to know that I think you are my knight in shining armor

But when I have the chance words run away and stupid giggles fill their place.

Why do words work that way?

Why do they run away?

And why do giggles replace them?

So here where you won't see

Here where you won't go,

Here where they'll never reach your eyes,

I can say it:

I like you.

Like you as if we were in high school.

Like you the way the band geek likes the quarterback.

Like you like that girl in the back of the room

   Who only took that seat so she could stare at you.

Please give me a chance.

Please don't pass me by.

Please ask me to the dance.

Please don't take a pass.

Words are my chosen profession.

Words create and destroy in my world.

So maybe one day my words will inspire you.

Maybe one day you'll see me trying

   And you can fill in the words that always run away...