I was kinda harsh to the men out there in blog land last night... I kinda apologize. Kinda. Sorta... uhm will you take me batting my eyes as a good enough pretend sorry??
No, really. I am sorry for calling ya'll pussies. That was a bit on the harsh side.
But dammit I am upset about today's men. Can one of ya'll step up and finally tell a woman what you are looking for? Do you even know? Cause uh, I am not the only one out here trying to snag a man and coming up with not even water.
So how many of you have been told the "There's other fish in the sea" line? Where? What sea? Can I get a fishing rod and some bait please?? Cause the waters here in Charlotte only differ from New Jersey's waters because the men here have more class than to get piss drunk and throw lines like "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" out at the ladies.
Speaking of ladies, you all know that that whole Lady in the streets but a freak in the bed means you might have to take us to bed to find out if we hold to that, right? I'm about done playing the lady. I've been playing the lady so damn long I feel like Susan Lucci before they finally gave that woman the Emmy. Dammit I want my Emmy, my Oscar, my whoever.
I just... I just want to give up. I want to just throw in the towel like I said I would do at 32 and be done.
Not to sound like I'm lowering myself in anyway, I am even willing to go back and be with a military man. I mean the military wasn't my issue when I was married, It was my service member. He was the one that did me dirty. Not the military. I think I would like a military man. They have a structure about them that kinda matches my own. Of course that might be because my sense of structure comes from being a Military wife. It took me a few years but I learned when to keep my mouth shut and nod n smile. Or at least not let them see that I was holding up a certain finger in response to something I was told to do. :-D
Ah, whatever...
So today is my daughter, Kayla Grace's eleventh birthday. That's right, she's turned eleven on the the eleventh hour or the eleventh day of the eleventh month of the eleventh year! Isn't that awesome?? They announced her name on the news and everything. Even had her picture. I am going over Patty's house tomorrow to record it off her tv with my phone and then I can put it up on Facebook or something to show everyone! She was at my mothers house for a sleep over but she got up to see it and was soo excited. I'm happy for her. I love it when my kids are happy.
So refer back to the blog on the 11th of November last year. You know that Kayla's birthdays are always a little bit extra special to me because it's God's reminder to me that he giveth and taketh away life. The woman that came in in distressed labor as I was supposed to go in lost her baby and a little part of me can't help but think that If she had not come in and I had gone would the Angel of death have taken my child? I honestly don't think there would be a Livy if I had lost Kayla. I tend to take the bad things in my lief and chew on them for a long time. Losing a child would have been something I was still chewing on eleven years later.
I'm going to go pop in a movie and sit on my bed and alternately watch it and read my book. All of my movies I've seen before and I've read this book at least three times before but I'm like that. I do that alot.
So goodnight. Enjoy the rest of your Veterans day. I hope all the soldiers/sailors out there had a good time. I hope you aren't like my ex who takes his military ID and goes to every single restaurant he can just to get the free appetizer and then bounces! LOL
Good night!
