I would just like you to note...

That the time as I am typing this is. 8:14 AM. 
On a Saturday.

I am awake before ten on a saturday.

Do you know why I am awake before ten on a Saturday?  Because we had a sleepover last night and at SEVEN FIFTEEN THIS MORNING, there was a WHAM of Almighty proportions and I thought my ceiling was going to come crashing in.

We had Kira over for an overnight last night.  All in all very good.  No trouble AT ALL.  Wanna stress that.  However I don't have rambuncous kids.  My kids get up in the morning and turn on a movie or the tv and sit quietly and eat quietly because they know that Mommy who sleeps is MUCH much MUCH nicer than Mommy who is woken up. 

Im still human if you really want to know.

I DO NOT foresee a late night tonight unless somewhere around three I catch a nap.

Ugh!  I am tired...

Oh?  What was the wham?? Kira jumped off Kayla's bed.  Teeny Tiny Little girl plus friction of falling through air plus meeting hard floor, equals WHAM.

I need coffee.  Terminally Single and blogging needs coffee... Lots of coffee.....

So Much..

...has happened in my life these last few days.

1. I got a fridge.
2. I got internet/TV/and phone
3. I got a security system!  YAY!
4. I got a couch.

My house is starting to look like a home.  Its so way beyond awesome I can't even begin to describe it!  For the first time in months, I feel okay.  Not awesome, not tubular or any of those other words but OKAY and if you know me, then okay is is as close to awesome as a second hand high with a cup full of alcohol. LOL!

Not even concerned about the man right this moment.  Dunno why.  I go through moments where if he shows its awesome if he doesn't it's the end of life as we know it, Then I got through times where if he doesn't show, oh the hell well, hes the one that missed out on another day with me.

Granted I still have those feelings that I can't explain.  Like my kids being absolutely nowhere around and I can hear a little girl laugh.  Or my kids will be stone asleep and I hear crying.  Or I drift off to sleep and a man with a baritone voice says "Goodnight.  I love you."  That one had me up and pondering a bit.  I finally chalked it up to having a very overactive imagination but then I heard it a few more times after I had alternately doused my brain with Alcohol or sleeping pills and I came up blank.

So right at the moment, life is okay.  not bad, not way good.  But okay.

So what should I talk about tonight?

I know.  Stupidity.

If you see a car coming and you still stand in the middle of the parking spot talking on your phone under the assumption that I will not hit you, you are stupid.  There is no way around that one.  Look at the license plates, bitch!  NEW JERSEY!!   Don't you know that means I will knock your stupid ass down just to get to the parking spot that's closer to the door?

You know what else is stupid?  Those guys that wear their pants so far down I see skin below their drawers.  Okay, seriously.  Not only are you stupid for letting your mirror lie to you and tell you that you looked good.  You are stupid because now you duck walk and I don't even feel the need to conceal the fact that I am laughing and pointing at you and yes, rest assured that annoying little snicker while I twitter your picture across the country, yeah that's me.  But then you have the one that wear them so low I see skin.  Either your mom is as ghetto as you or she just didn't teach you right.

And lets not forget the ones that have shit stains in the drawers and STILL wear them hanging low.  NO comment.

So I live in the bible belt.  I have accepted this fact.  I have embraced this fact.  Do you know what I cannot embrace?? Carving the name JESUS in the back of your damn skull!  I actually saw a WOMAN who had the back of her head shaved with the name JESUS in it.  I know his name, he knows his name, obviously you know his name.  Must we carve it in our heads?

While we are on the subject of heads... I have blond streaks but babe, they're braids.  Obvious braids.  You trying to rock that platinum blond weave that goes down to your ass when you are five four and blacker than my favorite sharpie marker... uh uh sweetie.  You gonna have to fire your mirror, your hairdresser, you clothes shopper, and hell just fire them all.  If you aren't a caramel, big tittie woman with a million dollars and named Lil' Kim, you are not rocking this style, you are knocking it and it is knocking you.

Old men with young women.  Seriously, I'm not discriminating but I just can't help thinking about the wrinkles on the dong and pushing them up to actually find the dong and...shudder... EW!!!!!

You know what, I could actually go on forever.  Charlotte is full of dumb people and I think I am going to try and get pictures.  Yes, I am.

I feel like netflixing something.  I will catch you all later!

One love!

Terminally Single and Blogging is calling it a night.

Long time no see!

Yeah I know, don't start...

"You promised that you were going to try and blog more and I haven't seen nor heard from you in almost a  month!!" 

Someone actually complained to me that I didn't go online and bore the masses with my constant whining...  Go fig.

But now I have Internet thanks to my more than awesome ma!


A lot has been going on and some of it good, some of it really fouled up but most of it just ehhh.  I PROMISE i will try my hardest to post more tonight about it, but at the moment I have to go get dressed to go get my ma!  Blog ya Later!

Terminally Single and Blogging is hittin the showers!

I NEED YOUR HELP!!!! PLEASE EVERYONE READ THIS!!!!

I know this post to my facebook and I need your help!!!

As you know my mother lives in a senior community that on its best days isn't the most courteous of places.  But this time, they have gone the distance to be the shittiest of shitty.

There is a Gay man that lives in her building that is also a cross dresser.  When he came to sign his lease for the apartment his preferred clothes were packed and he was "butch" so they had no problem with him but then the second that they saw he dressed as a woman, they decided that his behavior was inappropriate.  

The owner of the building was heard to be asking the handyman "what can be done to get rid of this?" in reference to Lee, the man in question.

Now they are refusing to take his rent for the month of April and have asked him to vacate the premises.  Based solely on this rancid act of discrimination.

PLease help!!!



The address and phone number of the community is:

The Senior Villages
1705 Queen City Drive
Charlotte, NC 28208

1.800.220.7187
Fax: 704.937.9393

The owner who wants Lee out is named Steve.

Please call your local news or call or write The Senior villages to complain.  I am trying to get this action reversed as I am opposed to any kind of discrimination and have NO HEART for bigots like these people.

Please help!!!

One more day....

So let me start this off right and say to all the happy couples, Happy Valentines Day.

I hate this day. I hate a lot of days but this day in particular is probably on that big list of days that truely suck.

As much as I wanna hunt down that winged brat. With the soggy diaper and a quiver full of arrows, (seriously, in the days where exploiting children is a major nono and being protective of all children is the new IT, NO ONE has bothered to notice that the main symbol of the day is a toddler, armed with sharp arrows and wearing nothing but a diaper that's gotta be loaded since he's been wearing it for centuries?? I'm so suprised some child advocate group hasn't come out against it.) Where was I? Oh yeah, as much as I want to bring that dammned toddler down and spank him, I still wait paitiently for MY arrow every year.

I find most days as well as valentines I wake up praying, "Please let today be the day I find my Prince Charming." I pray extra hard this day.

So I'm going to take the day in stride. I am not going to complain. I will try my best to stay away from all of those sappy happy couples that insist on amping up their PDA displays this day. And I will not threaten everyone that wishes me a happy Valentines day.

Le sigh...

Terminally Single and Blogging is going to knock a few hours off this majesticly shit promising day in bed.

I want to scream...

I know I am not worlds most patient person, hell, I'd probably be in the front run for most impatient person.

Yesterday at the near ass crack of morning, Gary from Cambridge called me and said he got the window and he'd be over on Thursday, today, to put it in. He said he'd be over at lunchtime maybe a little bit earlier. After all I usually sit at home all day anyway. Yes, he actually said that.

So at one thirty, I gave up and came to the hospital. I found her wheezing to the point of pain and discovered that she requested a neb treatment this morning and she had been ignored FOR HOURS. They had just decided to give her the pain med she had requested.

They got on point when I showed my coloring but this could have been avoided if I had been here.

To make matters worse Gary just called as I was typing the above and said he hadn't put me in as an appointment he was just going to come put the window in cause he had some other jobs out my way and he was just running behind. Its effing a quarter to three and he hadn't been able to pick up a phone and call to say this at twelve??? Then he said he was sorry I had waited so long and he'd call me later to see if I could be home this weekend to do the window.

I need to go food shopping this weekend. I can't sit around waiting for him to show or not show.

I can't do this anymore. I can't be one place for one thing and at the hospital. I need help and there's no one to do it.

I feel like screaming. I feel like just going to the woods and having a good scream....

I can't do this...

Hehe

Ever have one of those nights where you just wish the earth would open up and swallow you? Hmmm... this isn't one of those nights for me, but if you ever wanna talk, I'm sorta here. :o)

Hehe, I made a funny.

So I went to my grand aunts one hundreth birthday this weekend and man I forgot how much I loved my fams.

And almost all of them have that special someone to call sweetie. Gag me with a mixing spoon.

No, I'm not going to go into one of my when's it my turn wails, I'm far too drunk for that right now. Personally, I don't give a fuck right this second cause my dream guy is sitting in front of me and he's Russian.

Wow that was lame.

Hehe, I don't care...

So mom goed into surgery tomorrow. Nother hernia. She'll b out ina few days.

Uh oh random thought....

I wanna go to Australia. Okay.

I think mes needs a lighter hand with the vodka bottle. My white rjussians have the kick of a pissed off mule tonight. Good thing I only do this every now and then.

So my Valentines present to myself is going to be a hole in my face. I am finally getting my nose pierced. I'm kinda jazzed. This hole punching will be followed immediately by a massive drunkening.

After that, I'm going to get my contacts and I'm going to rock the stud, the eyes, and the hair and dare someone to tell me he's still realing from his ex or he sees me as a fracking friend. OMG if you knew how many times I have fallen face over foot for a guy and gotten either of those two lines... I so wanna go find these skags that are doing this to the guys I like and have a cat fight... like man, could you have just once NOT fucked over a guy I like???

Let's not discuss the other guys I like, I'm not young enough or skinny enough. Neither of these is bound to change so eff you.

Did I mention my dream guy kally luah and abso lute?

Okay I blogged, I've updated the two people that read this. Love you and goodnight!

Terminally Single and Blogging is way to drunk for her own damn good tonight.

One of those blogs...

Where I need to unload a little.

Bloggers, I have become the explination lady. And I really hate the job. I mean really really.

It started years ago. When the pieces of my marriage fell apart, it was me that ultimately explained the bare facts of what was going on. Like I said before, we never had the 'talk', but I did explain things. Then I explained the move. Then the next move. I explained the new school. And the next new school. Then I eplained charter school and uniforms. Then in 2008, I explained Ome's first hospital stay and the owie they had to go inside to fix. Then I explained me going to work. Then I had to explain how Daddy and Mrs. S could have a baby when they were not married. Wow.

Then Ome's second hospital stay. Then my decision to move them to where they basically knew no one. I had to explain why mommy was mad at the lack of stove and fridge. Nothing big.

A funny thing happened then, I stopped explaining to my kids and started explaining to everyone else. To my mom about why I deal when Randy jerks me around. To section eight, the food stamps, to medicare, the repeat that process about four times.

Most recently we switched back to my kids. I had to explain to then about the break in. I had to try an exolain my shellshock. Then they were supposed to have a sleep over on Saturday but then a bad thing happened that for the first time in a long time I had to skim the outer most layers of the situation to get something I could tell them and damn if they didn't spend Saturday and that night pissed as hell at me because in their world, I had called it off and it was my fault and they had been good all week for shit. I'm going to have a tough time promising the be good for a week for reward thing again.

So today I had to wake them up and tell them that Ome is in the hospital again. I had to explain that she needs surgery again. Except I had been explaining to children for so long I didn't notice I was now talking to tweens, pre tween and thinks I'm a tween. What came out was "Ome is in the hospital, she has an owie that they have to fix." When bounced back was, "Ome has o have surgery again? Is it her hernia or something else?"

Btw, its her hernia. The repair needs to be repaired. Trust Jersey Shore University Medical Center to eff it up once and three years later. From four hundred miles away no less. Now that's talent.

I can't do the explaining job anymore. I have no heart for it and apparently I kinda suck at it. What with my targert audience growing up and all.

Not a failure moment, bloggers, but a tired moment and not because I'm running fourteen hours on one hour sleep wih a body shaking cough. Just tired. Hand the microphone to the next person and just go the hell home tired.

I'm going to send the kids off to school and catch a few zzz's by the tail.

Good morning/night/ afternoon bloggers. Terminally Single and Blogging is going in search of sleep.

Because everyone simply NEEDS to know this!!

A chicken can be hypnotized, or put into a trance by holding its head down against the ground, and continuously drawing a line along the ground with a stick or a finger, starting at its beak and extending straight outward in front of the chicken.

Useful Facts for Android

$#!% my kids say...

Those of you with kids, have your kids ever said something that was so totally off and out there that it could be considered a zingger cause the shit zinged right past you with the force of a cannon??

The other day my kids were watching Shrek the Third (I can't wait to get forever after) and since this is maybe the hepzillionth time they've watched this they decided to tour the special features.

One of the features was a magic eight ball type thing called ask Mr. Merlin, the wizard in the movie. They asked it nonsense questions for an hour then after many pokes and prods got me to submit a question.

Well, my question was "Will I meant a rixh handsome man and get married?" Merlins answer was yes, definately yes. (I really love Merlin at this point.) Well, O come running into my room screaming, "he said yes, mommy, definately yes!" At this point she takes a running leap and lands on my full bodied and with a crash. She hugs me and then looks in my face and says, "I'm going to have a daddy again. One that loves us and wants to live with us cause he likes us!!"

Seriously??? (Thank Patty for bringing back the Greys Anatomy phrase.)

What the eff do you say to that sentence??? Do you call the dad and say we need to have a talk? Do you phone him and gloat? Or, do you sit and think what the hell has my divorce done to my kids??

We never had the divorce talk. Not once. Daddy was there one day and mommy was in tears, and daddy was gone and mommy smiled a real smile in perhaps the first time in their short lives. I'm pretty sure they figured it out after the first year. We even covered the why doesn't daddy live with us anymore at all thing. After all he was in the navy, they are used to him being absent in the home.

But still....

Seriously?????

And the funny thing is, I don't have one of those You-seriously-effed-up-as-a-mom clouds hanging over my head this time. I can't find it. I'm kinda lost in parenting territory here...

Terminally Single and Blogging is suddenly not so sure she can do ths parents of tweens thing....

*gasp*