So sick

I am so sick of people telling me that thunder is JUST a sound and that no one ever died of thunder.  Thunder cannot hurt me and it's an irrational fear that I need to get over.  By twelve o'clock today three people told me that it was basically a bullshit fear and I needed to get over it.  By ten tonight one more person said it.

The first person that said it said it via text so he didn't really see my reaction.  The next two people that said it to me, I kinda laughed along with them when they began to poke fun at the fear and the fourth person I really wanted to hit because he knows better.

I have been afraid of anything that represented itself with a loud boom since I was a little girl.  I refused to go to the fourth of July festivities because fireworks are basically a loud boom.  Thunderstorms.  Thunder is a loud boom.  I don't like balloons because when they pop, it's a loud boom.

So you say it's an irrational fear and I need to get over it.  I'm glad that you have that attitude.  Never ever show me any kind of fear you have because my advice to you is that you need to get over it.

I don't know how to make people understand that booms of any volume trigger something inside of me that makes me want to crawl in a corner and hold my arms around my knees until it stops.  I have been this way since I was a child.  For a long time I wouldn't even go to the bowling alley because of the crashing of the pins and the rumbling.  I managed to get over that at least.

It's not like it's my old fear.  I freak out in elevators with more than three people in them.  If I'm on an elevator and an overweight person gets on, I will get off.  It has nothing to do with their weight, I simply feel like I'm trapped and need to escape asap.

I just wish people would stop trying to tell me their views of my fears.  Maybe one day I'll conquer then and maybe I never will, but the least you could do is not make fun of me...